All I Need.

Today I want..
to eat chicken and N'shima. to dance like a crazy woman in church. to wear a chitenga. to wander dusty paths to random villages full of beautiful. broken, and precious people. I want to catch a taxi to town and be crammed in with strangers and chickens and things like what and so. I want to drink a Stoney and pay for it with Kwacha. I want to greet everyone with "Muli bwange? Bweno! Muli bwange?" I want to drink tea three times a day. I want the day to end with a brilliant orange sunset that fades into a night of a million stars.

I want to study and teach. and study and teach. and study and teach. I want to teach old people. I want to teach teenagers. I want to teach moms & dads. I want to teach kiddos. I want to teach them about Jesus. I want a classroom full of kids with a chalkboard and dusty floors and open, expectant hearts. I want a dozen or two smiling faces with checked shirts, trousers and skirts. I want to teach them about Jesus, yes, but also about the water cycle, and phonics, and multiplication tables, and germs and John Locke. I want them to learn how to read and write in the language that they think in. And in a language they can use for opportunities far beyond their village. I want to love them deeply. To know their names and their stories. To pray for them. To cry with and for them. To know their dreams. To laugh at their silliness. To challenge them. To see them the way Jesus does. To love them with His everlasting, unfailing love.

this is what I want.

but today...
I have a different gift.

today I have Texas.
I have black pants, black collared shirt, black socks, black shoes, green apron. I have pumpkin spice lattes. I have upside down caramel macchiatos. I have Walter. I have a Bible on my phone, a journal in my hand, and my heart open and listening. I have a family with potty-training, WALL-E, and Bible sing-along songs. I have a stinky, but lovable dog who sometimes leaves "presents" on my rug. I have a   gracious couple who have discipled and nurtured me and done whatever they can to help accomplish God's call in my life, even if that means letting me live with them. I have kiff music on my ipod. I have a meeting with ladies who keep the admin of our local church flowing. I have a Natelet coming into the world, and a friend who needs help sorting and preparing for his arrival. I have Arepas. I have a city that is really mine to live in, and love on, and embrace fully. I have a local church who knows how to do community, and a vision and a passion for the global church. I have the promise of one more fall-ish day in the forecast. And I have the confidence that this, here, and now, is exactly the precise place on this planet I am supposed to be.
which is all I need.

so, Africa-dreams, will have to find their little home in my heart and settle there once more, waiting patiently until it's time to fly again. :)

Winning.

Today was a day of winning.

FINALLY.

As a first year teacher, teaching a subject I didn't even know before I started (8th Grade Latin?!)
it's been a rough year. I've been chained to my book. Students would ask me if they had done a translation right and I would have no idea. I'd have to look up the answers. It was hard.  I made mistakes all the time. We were learning together and I was only one step ahead of them, if that, most of the time. And yet, slowly by slowly, I have been getting better. My understanding of the subject has grown. (And amazingly, so has theirs!)  So today was full of winning. I  was book free. I only has to check one answer, and it turns out I was right all along. Today I could look at the sentences my students were translating, and I could translate them in my head! I could tell them they were right, or wrong. And the amazing thing is that they are getting it too! Some students have done great all year long, while others have REALLY struggled. And today, in another big "win" of a moment, one of my students who had struggled all year, asked me to check a sentence he had translated, and it was PERFECT! He did it right, on his own, on his first try. And it was a little bit tricky. I was SO proud! They are getting it! It makes my teacher heart so happy! Granted, this is super basic Latin, but this is an incredible victory for all of us. Joy, oh joy! Not to mention, today was Friday, and a beautiful "spring" day. Oh, goodness, I've been in Texas too long, this is summer weather in WA for sure. So, today I am celebrating the goodness of God and His grace to us.

So, this is me, and this is what I do. 

My name is Miss Johnston, and I am an 8th Grade Latin Teacher, who, by the grace of God, wins.

the Eagle inside belongs to us....

Happy July 4th!

I don't have anything particularly eloquent to say.

But I thought I'd give a little love to the land where I was born and raised.

So USA, this is what I love so much about your founding fathers:

Watch as TJ, Ben Franklin, and John Adams decide what our national bird will be.

And yes, for the boy meets world fans out there, John Adams is in fact played by Mr. Feeney.

Omnivores for Mediocrity...

so I have recently realized that after February 1st, I have no plans for this year.... except for the holidays on the calendar and a few weddings i've been invited to...

the funny thing is that every adult I have mentioned that to has responded in the following way "Are you quitting your job?!"

NO.

but to me, my job is not really a plan... it just is. And i am so thankful for it. I love it. And call me crazy, but I really don't believe that I am alive today just so that a company in Bellingham could have another receptionist. I don't believe that this is "what I was created for!" It is in a small part, but I dream of bigger things!

I believe that six months ago. I lived, because God still has work for me to accomplish.

Just because I don't have a specific word on what it is yet, doesn't make it void.

I believe that Christians in general dream too small.

I believe that North Americans dream too small.

A thought came to my mind this week: If FEAR was completely gone from my life, how would I live? what would I do? what would my dreams look like then?"

I believe that God has a plan.
a bigger one than I could imagine.
And if I just trust my Heavenly Father, instead of esoterically trying to pinpoint just how I can claim His promises, but rather TRUST based on how I KNOW Him, then GOOD things will come. Healing. LIfe. Growth. Explosion. Blooming. It will happen.

I don't want apathy to win.

I don't want to live a life of mediocrity.

It will take courage.

which I am still trying to find.

but slowly by slowly, it comes.

DREAM BIG!